Dear professor Lockhart,

I wrote this poem from your point of view to make it more personal.

Arriving at night, the moon shining bright,
I walked to the major’s small household.
The door hung from one of its hinges. The sun
started rising and yet I grew cold.

I opened the door and saw blood on the floor,
I entered the bedroom, back upright.
The room was as still as a grave on a hill.
So the werewolf they feared struck tonight?

There was one left alive with no scratch of the strife,
His face was pale white, his eyes dim.
The major looked down on his dead wife’s nightgown,
And I saw how his loss consumed him.

'She left me,' he said, falling down on his bed.
'Her spirit flew out like a songbird.
At morning she sung,' and his calm mask sprung.
And he cried, I had no soothing words

'I'll find him, make sure no one else shall endure
The loss of a wife, child or man.'
With my promise and calls I could’ve addressed the walls,
But I said 'I will do what I can.'

I searched every day and each week of month May,
For a trace or a sign near the Mansion.
But no trace could be found in the house, on the grounds,
And I saw full moon coming with tension.

On the eve of full moon, the first day of June,
The answer came: ghastly but thrilling
The werewolf genome was in the major’s home
I started to see who’d been killing.

From his house came a shout so I pulled my wand out,
And I quietly opened the door.
The monster sat there with a mass of grey hair,
Once major, now wolf to the core.

Like a violent coyote he aimed for my throat,
His weight almost choked me to death.
And on his large paws he had fatal claws,
Would the last thing I smelled be his breath?

With my face in his hair and my last bit of air,
I shouted 'Homorphus' to change him.
The forceful spell flung him away from my lungs,
And his features grew smaller and slim.

The next day was a feast – they got rid of the beast,
The wolf that destroyed them was slain.
So thanks to me Wagga Wagga was free,
Of the werewolf that once caused them pain.

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Ratings and Comments

#1Zoki Phantom's AvatarZoki Phantom (rated this 10)

This is really nice!

I truly enjoyed reading it, keep up the awesome job. :)

#2Niniel Sanders's AvatarNiniel Sanders (rated this 10)

Oh you are so evil!
That is an evil story. Eating the poor creature. Naughty naughty you ;)

(yeah, so seriously: I thought it was brilliant. I loved how you managed to keep the the lines and syllables. That
s always my trouble wehn trying my hand a tpoetry. So I definately commend you on that.

Nice poem, actually telling a story. Well done!

#3Ben Bratton's AvatarBen Bratton (rated this 7)

I liked the poem, a bit awkward; but, I liked the detail! Need more submissions to beiw!

#4Adriane Charday's AvatarAdriane Charday (rated this 9)

Great poem, lots of effort was put in.

#5Nichole Taylor's AvatarNichole Taylor (rated this 8)

I absolutley loved the poem! The story was very moving, and the rhyming almost impeccable! I was sad during the part about the dead wife, good job putting in the emotion.

#6Pippa Cross's AvatarPippa Cross (rated this 9)

I loved how you wrote this poem! It flows perfectly and was very detailed!

#7Elise Dantes's AvatarElise Dantes (rated this 9)

This poem is wonderful! I love the flow of it, and its easy to read. Well done!

#8Colm Scar's AvatarColm Scar (rated this 9)

Oh wow that so imaginative and detailed.I loved it.It also gives some backstory into Lockhart.

#9Paris Zaimis's AvatarParis Zaimis (rated this 7)

Very nice! You've got a brilliant imagination but it was very detailed!

#10Annie Lightfoot's AvatarAnnie Lightfoot (rated this 9)

If there was 9 1/2 I would give you that because nobody can be perfect, but this is close. Awesome! I really like it. If I was Lockhart then I would say, "Very nice. But what about my perfectly wavy hair and brilliantly white teeth?" :) Really good.

#11Katie Gryffin's AvatarKatie Gryffin (rated this 9)

great poem, really creative and obviously alot of effort was put in.

#12Jou Kaiba's AvatarJou Kaiba (rated this 8)

The ryming was good and it interested me but it seemed not quite right.
Good Job though

#13Jacques Preux's AvatarJacques Preux (rated this 10)

Oh my goodness! This is an excellent poem! I love it. Great job!

#14David Hester's AvatarDavid Hester (rated this 10)

Brilliant! Very detailed and it was easy to follow!

#15Angela Franco's AvatarAngela Franco (rated this 8)

Great history, a like a lot... it's a great idea thta you used the point of view of the professor... and all the details in the poem make it more interesting!! great job!

#16Lucy Greyback's AvatarLucy Greyback (rated this 9)

I liked the way it rhymed. It was interesting and creative. Good job! ^^

#17Lilly Stargazer's AvatarLilly Stargazer (rated this 9)

This was such a great poem! It flowed well and was rather descriptive.

#18Sara Swan's AvatarSara Swan (rated this 7)

The story was vivid and intresting, but the rhyming was a distraction for me.

#19Nikkie Skyler's AvatarNikkie Skyler (rated this 10)

This poem is amazing! It was so vivid that I thought I was actually there. Using the actual perspective of Lockhart was a fantastic idea!

Nikkie Skyler

#20Gabrielle Cadeaux's AvatarGabrielle Cadeaux (rated this 7)

Very creative and cute. There was a lot of detail put into this one :)

#21Alice Doyle's AvatarAlice Doyle (rated this 9)

Wow, that was a long one - but wonderful. I really enjoyed the rhythm and the story.
Very creative.

#22Emily Cullen's AvatarEmily Cullen (rated this 7)

Rhyming was a bit off, but overall a good poem

#23Alex Night's AvatarAlex Night (rated this 10)

I really love how creative you are! VERY nice!!!

#24Ariana Droledumb's AvatarAriana Droledumb (rated this 9)

Yea I also keep voting for this I guess,

the best I could find

#25Soluna Moore's AvatarSoluna Moore (rated this 9)

fantastic job! Rhymes very well and you really get the sense of what our wonderful Professor went through!

#26Ginger Roenick's AvatarGinger Roenick (rated this 7)

The story itself is very vivid, but the inconsistent rhythm and rhyming unfortunately was a distraction. All in all a good, solid effort.

#27Bere Lee's AvatarBere Lee (rated this 10)

Wow!! That's so wonderful great job seriously I loved how the story went it requires such great dedication to do something like that. Please continue writing :)

#28Joel Aireserkeiel's AvatarJoel Aireserkeiel (rated this 8)

Wonderful. Very descriptive and the whole thing goes well together. Good job!

#29Corazie FitzWarin's AvatarCorazie FitzWarin (rated this 7)

My favourite verse is the last, it's more consistant within itself than the others. There's a nice rythym.

#30Esmerelda Hopkirk's AvatarEsmerelda Hopkirk (rated this 6)

I liked it, the decriptions were good and I can see ol' Lockheart in this ^^
The ryhming was a bit too inconsisant for my liking though.

#31Jinxy Jo's AvatarJinxy Jo (rated this 9)

I really like the descriptions you use and I like the fact it's in Lockharts perspective :)

#32Coryphee Etoile's AvatarCoryphee Etoile (rated this 8)

I really loved this! It was very entertaining and well written!

#33Kaie Adair's AvatarKaie Adair (rated this 8)

This was very good, I think.
I liked the rhythm the most.

#34Drizzt Viri's AvatarDrizzt Viri (rated this 9)

I really like this one, especially how it is done through Lockhart's point of view!

#35Jessalyn Norton's AvatarJessalyn Norton (rated this 8)

Although this poem seems long for a submission of this nature, I wouldn't consider it long for a real homework assignment so I can't count that against you. It seems really well thought out and very descriptive. Good work.

#36Amanda P. X. Sim's AvatarAmanda P. X. Sim (rated this 8)

It's a good one - I couldn't have done that myself ;P I like the storyline of major turned werewolf... once major, now wolf to the core. thumbs up!

#37Iris B. Bagshot's AvatarIris B. Bagshot (rated this 8)

Very entertaining and love that you took the perspective of Lockhart

#38Alyx Hyperion's AvatarAlyx Hyperion (rated this 7)

This is really good! the rhythm is very accurate and I enjoyed it. It's kind of funny how he didn't actually do that stuff, isn't it?

#39Oliver Pendrix's AvatarOliver Pendrix (rated this 8)

wow this was amazing. I really enjoyed reading this well done :)

#40Sarah Evans's AvatarSarah Evans (rated this 9)

It was probably what Lockhart would've wanted. Good work!

#41Genevieve Leshire's AvatarGenevieve Leshire (rated this 9)

I really liked this poem. It really discribe the adventure of the defeat of the werewolf. Good Job!

#42Allison Kristin Clifton's AvatarAllison Kristin Clifton (rated this 8)

Very good and intense! I liked it! Due to the rhyme and storyline one can read it easily and gets caught in it! Great!

#43Muffy McFearson's AvatarMuffy McFearson (rated this 9)

Very fun and full. Quite enjoyable and visual

#44Thestral Winters's AvatarThestral Winters (rated this 9)

I loved it! You described everything brilliantly

#45Fredrick Garret's AvatarFredrick Garret (rated this 9)

I was a really fun poem. It had a nice smooth rythm. The beginning was very descripted.

#46Kathryn Elle's AvatarKathryn Elle (rated this 8)

It was a really good poem and was fun to read. I liked it.

#47Catriona Watson's AvatarCatriona Watson (rated this 9)

the poem flows very well and it really sounded very personal and I enjoy reading it, well done.

#48Heraldo Symmonds 's AvatarHeraldo Symmonds (rated this 9)

I enjoyed your format, it was fun. It was not a poem but an epic adventure which captivated me! Great job, keep up the amazing work!

#49Albus Fitzgerald's AvatarAlbus Fitzgerald (rated this 9)

So passionate and dramatic. The downside is that it did go on but, that is the price to pay for such a good poem.

#50Amy Ellaway's AvatarAmy Ellaway (rated this 9)

this poem has a very good rhyme pattern and i got stuck in straight away!

#51Linnix Henson's AvatarLinnix Henson (rated this 9)

I like the backstory you gave. You obviously have a way with words. Good job. :)
And the whole "thanks to me..." part. Classic Lockhart.

#52Melinda Honeywell's AvatarMelinda Honeywell (rated this 7)

Very interesting rhyme pattern! I love that you rhymed "coyote" with "throat", that gave me a good giggle!

#53Florentine Awen's AvatarFlorentine Awen (rated this 9)

Amazing. The flow is perfect and I love your attention to detail. And it's definitely not too long, in my opinion.

#54Sarah Asthenia's AvatarSarah Asthenia (rated this 8)

That was a really good poem!
You use a lot of good discriptions.

It was a bit long for my likings though, but that's all just down to personal preferance.

#55Anatu Nerezza's AvatarAnatu Nerezza (rated this 9)

I really enjoyed it; it made me laugh, it flows so well and you managed to give depth to the poem. Well done! :)

#56Tatriana Maxwell's AvatarTatriana Maxwell (rated this 9)

It flows brilliantly and is a very entertaining read. You have not only wrote a poem, but a story. I enjoyed reading it.

#57Emma Barker's AvatarEmma Barker (rated this 9)

That was really great! It ryhmed made sense, and was the perfect length!

#58Pete Hester's AvatarPete Hester (rated this 10)

this was very brilliant indeed i loved the backround of the story.

#59James Cheney's AvatarJames Cheney (rated this 9)

Amazing! I know i could never have devoted myself to this!
Great work!

#60Sobe Magesblood's AvatarSobe Magesblood (rated this 10)

That was really good! I don't know why everyone is saying it's a bit long. I think it was a good length. It was really well done. Good job once again.

#61Ben Bowtrukle's AvatarBen Bowtrukle (rated this 8)

I enjoyed it, but it just went on a bit, and you started to get bored. :(

#62Ronja Liek's AvatarRonja Liek (rated this 10)

How can something so good can ever be long enough?
I'd say

we want more

#63Holly Muse's AvatarHolly Muse (rated this 10)

Haha it made me laugh. I love the way you keep to the story, also the descriptions you use.

#64Finn Cullen's AvatarFinn Cullen (rated this 10)

Great to see a lengthy poem dealing with the story in depth - brilliant use of rhyme and metre.. and an exciting story too! Much better than Lockheart deserves, the great ponce.

#65Rose Alstien's AvatarRose Alstien (rated this 8)

It rhyms! it was a touch long though.