"Sir, the king has called for you; he says it's urgent!"
Those are the words that spurred me into action. As a knight, it's my sworn duty to protect the people of my king, as well as quest in foreign lands to help anyone in need.
As the king began to speak, I realized this was no ordinary mission to hunt a boar, or find aliens who were destroying crops. This was a mission of life or death, the most important mission of my career.
"My good knight, this mission is as follows: find my daughter Princess Princessina, she has something important for you to do."
Princess Princessina was easy to find, as she spent hours everyday cultivating her belching fungi in her toadstool garden. As I walked into the foul-smelling "garden," she turned, her face lighting up when she saw me.
"Oh, Mister Knight, thank goodness you're here! I can't get my spade out of the ground, and I need it back to plant more fungi! Please help me!"
I stared in disbelief. My quest was to pull a spade out of the ground? I couldn't refuse though; the princess was second in command, and the king himself told me to help her. I crouched down, pulled on the spade, and
"BRAGAGLRHLAGLHL!!!" The spade came alive, or rather, what I thought was a spade. It turns out the Princess and the King had been cultivating sentient fungi, and this one was a little too strong for them to handle.
'Finally, a real challenge," I thought to myself. Grasping my spear firmly with both hands, I stabbed the spade tentacle-like creature. It squealed at an unearthly pitch, and started to jab at me viciously from every side.
After a long and grueling battle, Princess Princessina herself hit the spade on the head with a mushroom shaped like a heart. The monster collapsed to the ground, and dissolved as enemies are prone to doing at death.
"Thank you so much for helping, good knight," the princess said. "Please report back to my father with this note. I wrote it during the first half hour of the fight while you were fighting the monster instead of helping you.
Sighing at the princess's lack of concern, I reported back to the king.
"Thank you for helping my beautiful daughter. It seems we've got quite quite a powerful fungus among us!"
When the king uttered the world's oldest pun, I fell collapsed. I took comfort in the fact that I had completed my mission, and died in a highly unknight-like fashion.