Modules #4/#8 - “MONOLOGUES” - Spring 2022

[Prof. Sindor Aloyarc]

Welcome to the Module 04 and Module 08 "Monologues" thread!

("Scroll-and-a-Half" / 150 words)

Consider what you've written down from your brainstorm in the Meditation portion of our exercises. What jumps out at you that's wanting to be explored a little more deeply? Come up with a topic based around these meditations and write an essay about your personal perspective on the matter. This could be a single aspect or multiple elements from your list. In addition to sending in via e-mail, if you feel like sharing with your peers go ahead and post here with or without including your "Meditation" and/or "Mindfulness" responses added in together. This is voluntary and will not effect your points one way or another, however it will add to our community vibe and could stir up conversation for any "Mingling" points you may wish to accrue as Extra Credit.

[Prof. Tarma Amelia Black]

What jumps out at me, from the meditation, is that I've not so much changed, as gotten rid of, am getting rid of, that which isn't me as I am personally. It's almost as if I'd been 'wearing' the resonances of so many people, and not been just me. Almost as if there was no 'just me' here. But now I'm developing a sense of self here which is of my own beingness, and not Pygmalioned by people who want me to be what they want me to be. And I'd had no immunity to their 'will' (to their choices of who and what I am) and I'd involuntarily become that. Multiply that by the number of people who wanted me to be a certain way, and yes, it got confusing. What does that have to do with family? With friendship? I find that as I claim who and what I truly am, and accept this for myself, those who I regard as Family and Friends also changes. Perhaps it's not so much that they change, as my definition of what is 'family' changes ... of what are 'friends' changes. It turns out that yes, all of us be of a Family, of Life, in the larger picture. But how lovely to be a 'me' with a family, with friends, of similar resonances to myself.

[February Fortescue]

This is actually not the Monologue I wrote, but is a mash up of Media and Memory. I thought it was two unusual perspectives, which definitely applies to myself! Also Tarma mentions not being who people expect you to be, which ties into Media.

Maybe my sharing this will also help someone explore their own thoughts

Media:

On the outside chance you haven't noticed, I'm a huge fan of the group The Beatles and have always felt drawn to George Harrison. I'm totally convinced he was a fellow INFJ. Anyway, I read lots of Beatles books and probably the best one including George Harrison was written by Chris O'Dell, and is called Miss O'Dell. Chris is an American who followed her dreams: she traveled to England and became a Beatles groupie. It's not as sleazy a lifestyle as it sounds, and as her skills grew, she became an assistant and tour manager to not only the Beatles but the Rolling Stones.

She wrote about when her son once asked her how to become friends with a group of people who were already tight knit and not interested in him. She had learned the secret from interacting with band members, because they have to keep their guard up around people they don't know. She told her son to sit back and observe them. Learn their personalities, their likes and pet peeves. Once you've done that, model their behavior, repeat their thoughts back to them and don't tick them off and they'll let you in their group. Once you've been fully accepted, you can become more and more yourself.

And that's what familiarity is all about, i think- finding yourself in another person and feeling accepted.

Memory:

(The general idea behind this true story is Familiarity - I'm familiar with this type of behavior and while it's painful, it's comfortable and familiar.)

I remember one Christmas time, so many decades ago. I had been attending college and had managed to earn some additional spending money from typing student papers. I would spend hours trying to decide what to buy for mom, grandma, and my brother.

One afternoon, I spotted the perfect gift for grandma: it was a watch! It had a plain brown band - i knew grandma was no girly girl and loved the color brown. Instead of numbers, the watch had the names of each of Jesus' twelve disciples and had Jesus in the center, holding a lamb. It wasn't an expensive watch, maybe $30 by today's inflation. But I knew she'd LOVE it

When the watch arrived, I excitedly showed it to my mom, who doubted grandma would like it at all. Little did I know, mom and her sisters had gotten together and bought her a $150 watch! I was sad, but wrapped my humble gift anyway, brought it to grandma's yearly Christmas party and placed it underneath her Christmas tree.

Everyone was there: me, mom, my brother, mom's sisters and their husbands and children Grandma began unwrapping her gifts. When she got to mine, she looked at me, said she'd unwrap mine later, walked into the kitchen, and placed it on top of the refrigerator. I suppose the message was, "I don't choose to spend this precious family gathering unwrapping a gift from YOU when I could be unwrapping gifts from people I value more."

I walked out and went home.

About a week later, grandma remembered my gift on top of her refrigerator and unwrapped it. She fell in love with that watch and wore it every day, choosing it over the more expensive watch. This shocked her daughters, but they accepted it and when she passed away they wanted to bury her with it, but the funeral director talked them out of it. I was given the watch back. I still have it.

(No, she never apologized)